My boyfriend and I have been dating for about 6-7 months... I've met his family and are getting close to them. He was in a bad marriage before and his mother says even since little he's been so weird about being around people he used to take his christmas gifts into his room and open them by himself. Also for about the past month we've been practically living together. Just trying to give you backstory. Well I understood when he didnt want to come up on christmas, it was still pretty early. I asked him to come up for easter with his two little girls for only like 20 mins. I said they could come up the little girls could get their easter baskets and he could have a cookie and it would be done and over with. Well, by six he didn't show so I called them, he started making all these excuses that the girls were dirty and he didnt want my family to judge him, so I left my aunts, went to his sisters house to give the girls their presents, we didnt speak. I left and went back to my aunts. I told him later that night that he knew it was really important to me and how hurt I was. I didnt sleep at his house last night. We're kinda talking, he still wants me to look at this rental property with him today. Sorry for rambling but I am just so frustrated. Pretty much my family thinks he's rude and ignorant, my mom now hates him, because he also snubs her but I see my life with him. I dont know what to do. How do I make this right?
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He sounds very anti-social. I know it's hard not to take it personally but with people like this you really can't. I have missed weddings, birthdays, Easters all sorts of things in my life. I get around people and I get nervous. I never know what to say and what I do say is wrong. I get sick to my stomach even just thinking about being in public. I don't eat out at restaurants or go to peoples houses for parties. My point is, when we feel like this WE miss out on a lot of things. It is your choice whether to miss out on life with him or find way to compromise. If you really like him then you have to understand. If you want to spend time on holidays with your family and his daughters ask him if you can bring them with you? As for your family explain to the people that you can trust not to make a scene of it that he feels this way and hope for the best. If you start living together he will have the chance to get to know your family a little by little. Find out what him and your mother have in common and prepare both of them with conversation starters in a subject they BOTH feel comfortable talking about. Good Luck!
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