There is a long history between my mom, her sister, her brother and his wife. Her brother is very insensitive and when we were kids, he did things like lock us out of the house, take our toys, and said mean things. His wife just laughed and said things like - oh that's not nice. Looking back she should have stopped him. Anyway, by him doing this; it was permission for he, his wife and our cousins to continue doing this to us as we grew up. My mom was somewhat too nice and never wanted to create waves so she just let it be. She probably could have said something to them also but she was somewhat afraid due to her mom and did not want to break up the family. All during holidays, they bought us awful stuff (garage sale items and re gifts). Nothing we ever wanted, needed or was able to return because they didn't have tags. We watch them open the thoughtful gifts that my mom gave to them. My Dad never cared for them. However, he just went along with it too. In any event, my Aunt (mom's sister-in-law) would also invite my parents for events which they had to (holidays, etc). However, one year when we were really little, they invited my parents to a christening for her sister-in-law and told my parents they had to get a babysitter for us. When my parents got there, there were tons of kids and even a puppet show going on. It was definitely kid friendly. Another instance was when my grandmother was in the hospital on her death bed and my uncle (mom's brother) asked her for $5.00 for the T.V. sick!!!!!!! My dad heard this and could not believe it. Another things is when we went there for Easter, my mom made easter baskets for all three of their kids and there was nothing for us so my uncle took some candy out of the kids basket and broke it up in pieces giving all three of us a piece of candy. As we got older, one of the cousins was having a party and asked me if I wanted to come. So my friend and I got in the car (1/2 hour drive) and came to the party. When we got there, I put my arms out to hug my cousins and one of them said to me - we invited you but didn't think you were really going to come. Then they ignored us and we left. There is so much, I could just keep writing. However, the latest and greatest is this last time. My cousin, Karen the daughter of my mom's brother was toying with the idea of having a 75 surprise birthday party for her mom. she asked me and my sister to hold the date. Then at the baptism for my son, she said that she didn't think she was going to do it because she was renovating her home and that she couldn't afford a restaurant. (key - She was telling me this in a restaurant my husband and I were paying for as we invited all to the baptism). Anyway, I just looked at Karen and said why don't you wait until the fall and really surprise her. She said that's an option and changed the subject. A few weeks later and one week to the date of the party she was going to have, my sister and I received an email telling us that she was having a party with just the "older" folks and mainly relatives at a restaurant and that she was dis inviting us. She wrote this whole email about how she went over in budget for her home renovations and that it was just too much for her to pay and that her sister was not working so she was paying for everything and that no cousins were going to be there. That same day, my parents got an email inviting them to the party. I was a bit surprised that she uninvited us but I just figured "oh well" and perhaps she couldn't afford it. Anyway, my parents went to the party and as soon as they got there, my mom went into the bathroom and called me and told me that cousins from the other side of the family (my mom's sister-in-laws nephew and his family). Not right! Also, no one asked where we were so they must have known we were not invited. My Aunt walked in and she said "oh - I am so surprised" but never said to my mom - where are the girls! Then the best was when they sat down to eat, my aunt made this speech to my everyone about making it there and my mom said to my uncle well - my kids would have like to be here and he said - talk to Karen. Therefore, we are convinced that he knew ahead of time and it wasn't a surprise to him as she told us in her email that it was. Then the best part of this story is that as my mom was leaving, she said my uncle signing the check!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Now, my sister and I are very upset and feel that we, once again, are considered second class citizens to them. I refuse to go to any of their functions anymore. It's awful to have relatives treat you this way. Can someone tell me if I am feeling insulted for no reason or is this valid?
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I think cutting them out would help you keep your sanity.
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